ARE THEY YOUR PEOPLE?
If they're gossiping behind your back… they are not your people!
If they are criticizing and diminishing you in any way… they are not your people!
If they judge you for being you… they are not your people!
If they whisper, “I can't believe she did… I can't believe she said… who does she think she is?” they are not your people!
If they lie or tell half-truths about you… they most certainly are NOT your people!!
If you can't speak your Truth in front of them without they're looking at you like you just kicked a puppy (lordy, lordy)… they are NOT your people!!
If you need to tone yourself down, filter yourself or turn yourself into a pretzel in any way shape or form in order to survive time with them… they most definitely are NOT your people!!
If you have to be anything but your genuine, authentic, wholehearted ‘this is me in all my glory' self in order for them to be comfortable… they are not your fucking people, people!!
Now I totally get that there are times when we have to spend time with people who are not our people. #dutycalls
Just know… “these are not my people”… and adjust your ‘expectations' accordingly. DO NOT expect these people to ‘get you' or ‘it'… they can't. They won't. Leave it be…
AND spend as little of your precious Life with people who are not your people as possible!! Get it? They are not your people!!
YOUR PEOPLE are going to LOVE ALL OF YOU EXACTLY as you are!
YOUR PEOPLE are going to INSPIRE AND ENCOURAGE YOU to reach for the stars and GO FOR that CRAZY DREAM!
YOUR PEOPLE want YOU to become ALL that you can be…
They certainly aren't going to want you to continue to play small so they don't look bad/feel bad.
They certainly aren't going to feel insecure at the thought of you outshining them! They'll want you to SHINE!!
AND YES! Depending on the family… and sometimes… especially if it's your family… EVEN where your family is concerned… they are not necessarily our people!!
I've learned that small doses and strong boundaries can be a very healthy thing. I've also learned that there are some people we need to love from a distance for self-preservation.
The Truth is, what many endure at the hands of their ‘family' is no freaking joke! It's not because they are our ‘family' that they have special privilege to diminish, mistreat, manipulate or abuse us on any level.
People will often stay hooked into those dynamics out of some distorted sense of duty to the ‘family.'
Our FIRST and primary duty is to ourselves… always!
Here's the thing…
We become the average of the 5 people we spend the MOST time with…
Our mindset, health, finances, emotional and spiritual life… ALL of our personal development… will rise or fall depending on who we expose ourselves to regularly!! Who we spend the MOST time with!!
Don't believe me? Look over your shoulder at the last five years and who you spent the most time with. Right?!!
Now, ask yourself…
Who are you exposing yourself to regularly?
Are they who you want to be/become?
Seriously! Is THAT who you want to be in five years?!!
Because my Friend, know this…
What they have is catchy!! For better or worse…
So make sure you're catching the right stuff!
And fear not…
If you can't find mentors and a Soul-Mate-Tribe where you are… you can find them on the interwebs!
There are 2 billion effing people on FB alone!
YOUR Soul-Mate-People… YOUR Tribe… they're out there!!
Find them and Rise!!
Have a FABULOUS FUCKING day Gorgeous!!
#knowyourvalue #unlockyourfreedom
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Author
Tamie M
Life Coach
Empowerment life coach specializing in codependency, destructive narcissism, and narcissistic abuse recovery. Helping people heal from painful family of origin and romantic relationship patterns so they can finally live their best life in peace, confidence, and freedom.
FREE 30-minute Web Class!
Learn what it REALLY takes to fully recover from codependency, narcissistic abuse, and family of origin dysfunction and trauma.
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10 rare empath superpowers all empaths unknowingly have
10 secrets all narcissists keep
10 signs you’re the family scapegoat
10 tactics to put a narcissist in their place
10 telltale signs of narcissistic abuse syndrome
10 things a narcissist would say to provoke you
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11 ways to recognize a covert narcissist
12 signs it’s time to end an adult friendship
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13 narcissistic manipulation tactics
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13 signs you’re having sex with a narcissist
3 psychological tricks to make narcissistic people respect you instantly
3 secrets to disarm a narcissist
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7 things narcissists do when you go no contact
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7 things that destroy a narcissist’s ego
7 things that shock a narcissist to their core
7 tips for manifesting everything you want and deeply desire consistently
7 traits of a high value woman
7 ways to outsmart a narcissist in conversation
8 phrases that scream narcissism
8 red flag signs of narcissistic abuse
8 rules for how to communicate with a narcissist effectively
8 signs you're a super empath i the narcissist's worst nightmare
8 ways to make a narcissist respect you
8 ways to make a narcissist respect you forever
8 ways to outsmart a narcissist
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absurd narcissistic abuse tactics
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am i a narcissist or codependent
am i a narcissist or is my partner
am i a narcissistic person test
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am i the narcissist in the relationship
am i the narcissist or codependent
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blocking a narcissist after discard
blocking narcissist on social media
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classic narcissistic sex patterns
co parenting with a covert narcissist
co parenting with a narcissist
codependency and narcissism l how codependent sincerity hurts you
codependency and narcissism relationships
codependent codependency healing
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codependent relationship with a narcissist
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covert narcissistic personality disorder
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covert narcissists in relationships
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emotional manipulation in relationships
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emotionally abusive narcissists
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grey rock with a narcissist mother
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holiday season difficult people
how a narcissistic family selects the family scapegoat
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how to beat a narcissist in conversation
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how to communicate with a narcissist husband
how to communicate with a narcissist mother
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how to disarm a narcissist woman
how to end a conversation with a narcissist
how to end a conversation with a narcissist politely (and leave without being rude)
how to exit a conversation with a narcissist
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how to expose a narcissist in the workplace
how to expose a narcissist in therapy
how to expose a narcissist to others
how to expose a narcissistic boss
how to expose the narcissist for who they are
how to get a narcissist to leave you
how to get away from a narcissist ex
how to get away from a narcissist friend
how to get over someone you love
how to get your life back together
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how to handle a covert narcissist with strength
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how to handle a narcissist at work
how to handle a narcissist friend
how to handle a narcissist husband
how to handle a narcissist wife
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how to handle a narcissistic mother
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how to love yourself and be confident so you can win in 2024
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how to make a narcissist leave you alone
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how to make a narcissist miserable
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how to make a narcissist regret leaving you
how to make a narcissist respect me
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how to manifest your dream life
how to manifest your dream life by design after narcissistic abuse
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how to outsmart a narcissist in conversation
how to outsmart a narcissist silent treatment
how to outsmart a narcissist the right way
how to outsmart a narcissist woman
how to protect yourself from a covert narcissist
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how to put a narcissist in their place
how to raise your frequency after narcissistic abuse
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how to reinvent yourself after a breakup
how to reinvent yourself after a divorce in your 50's
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how to reinvent yourself at 40
how to reprogram your subconscious mind and heal your identity after narcissistic abuse
how to respond to narcissist rage
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how to say no to a narcissistic mother
how to set and enforce boundaries
how to set and keep boundaries with a narcissist
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how to shut down a narcissist husband
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how to shut down the narcissist without even saying a word
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how to speak up for yourself at work
how to speak up for yourself in a relationship
how to spot a narcissist at work
how to spot a narcissist early in dating
how to spot a narcissist friend
how to spot a narcissist in a relationship
how to spot a narcissist when dating
how to spot covert narcissist personality disorder
how to spot emotional manipulation in a relationship
how to spot the hidden signs of gaslighting in relationships
how to spot the signs of a conversational narcissist
how to stand your ground with a narcissist
how to stop a narcissist in his tracks
how to stop gaslighting in a relationship
how to survive narcissistic relationships with grace
how to take the ultimate revenge on a narcissist / don't fight or argue
how to talk to a narcissist boyfriend
how to talk to a narcissist ex
how to talk to a narcissist father
how to talk to a narcissist husband
how to talk to a narcissist mother
how to talk to a narcissistic husband
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how to trust yourself after gaslighting
how to trust yourself after narcissistic abuse
how to trust yourself again after narcissistic abuse
how to trust yourself and be confident
how to trust yourself and build real self-confidence
how to trust yourself implicitly after narcissistic abuse
how to trust yourself in a relationship
how to use the grey rock method with a narcissist
how to walk away from a narcissist
how to walk away from a narcissist relationship
ignoring the narcissist hoover
in a relationship with a narcissist
inside the mindset of the covert narcissist
inverted narcissism! what is it and how to spot it? inverted narcissism
inverted narcissist codependent
inverted narcissist vs codependent
is gaslighting emotional abuse
key phrases to disarm a narcissist
malignant narcissism and lying
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manifestation meditation sleep
manifestation techniques manifestation affirmation
manifesting wealth and abundance
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manipulative narcissist mother
manipulative narcissist personality disorder
mother enabling narcissistic son
narcissism and compulsive lying
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narcissist and empath communication
narcissist baiting after discard
narcissist baiting and bashing you
narcissist hoovering after no contact
narcissist ignores you on purpose
narcissist lies about everything
narcissist phrases they say to you (top 10)
narcissist psychopath sociopath
narcissist social media mind games
narcissistic personality disorder characteristics
narcissistic abuse documentary
narcissistic abuse healing that works
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narcissistic depression characteristics
narcissistic disorder symptoms
narcissistic emotional manipulation
narcissistic families characteristics
narcissistic father enabling mother
narcissistic hoovering after discard
narcissistic hoovering after no contact
narcissistic hoovering after silent treatment
narcissistic hoovering after years
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narcissistic hoovering techniques
narcissistic lying manipulation
narcissistic manipulation tactics
narcissistic manipulation techniques
narcissistic mother hoovering tactics
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narcissistic personality examples
narcissistic personality disorder
narcissistic relationship signs
narcissistic sibling characteristics
narcissistic sibling enabling parent
narcissistic traits but not a narcissist
narcissistic traits in a relationship
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narcissistic traits silent treatment
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narcissistic women characteristics
narcissists and pathological lying
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narcissists attract each other
narcissists lying and cheating
narcissists pathological lying
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narcissists’ 8 favorite catchphrases (spot them a mile away)
narcissists’ 8 favorite catchphrases - spot them a mile away
narcissist’s manipulation tactics
noxious narcissistic behaviors
noxious narcissistic behaviors in relationships to watch out for
only a super empath can crush a narcissists ego
only a super empath can destroy a narcissist
outsmart narcissist mind games
personalities that attract narcissists
phases & phrases: don't fall for these gaslighting tactics
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phrases to disarm a narcissist
phrases to say to a narcissist
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reactive abuse and gaslighting
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red flag narcissistic behaviors
scapegoat vs codependent empath
self-care to cope with a narcissist
setting boundaries with a narcissist
setting boundaries with a narcissist and keeping them
setting boundaries with a narcissist and toxic people in your life
setting boundaries with a narcissist in a way that works
setting effective boundaries with narcissists
seven mind games played by the narcissist to hurt you
signs of emotional intelligence
signs of narcissistic girlfriend
signs of narcissistic personality disorder
signs of narcissistic relationship
signs you are suffering from narcissistic abuse syndrome
signs you have defeated the narcissist
signs your family is using you as the family scapegoat
signs you’re dating a narcissist
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signs you’ve suffered narcissistic abuse
successful dating after narcissistic abuse
super empath destroy narcissist
super empath vs covert narcissist
super empath vs narcissist and codependent empath
surviving narcissistic discard
surviving narcissistic hoovering
surviving narcissistic husband
surviving narcissistic parents
surviving narcissistic relationships
